"Toxic Relationships" by Ellen Mary Dykas. A Review

 

Toxic Relationships: Taking Refuge in Christ

It came in the mail as a gift the other day, so my wife and I sat down and used it together in our evening devotions. "Toxic Relationships: Taking Refuge in Christ" is a 104-page softback devotional crafted by Ellen Mary Dykas, women’s ministry coordinator at Harvest USA and the author of Sexual Sanity for Women as well as several mini-books. This is part of the "31-Day Devotionals for Life" series edited by Deepak Reju. My wife and I just finished the easy-to-read mini-manual tonight and I rushed right in to give it this review.

"Toxic Relationships" is exactly what this book is about. Each devotional begins with a Scripture passage, and then 1.5 pages of reflections on the biblical text and how it addresses some aspect of our relationship's toxicity and the Gospel-remedy. Dykas tackles same-sex  associations, marriages, dating, abusive affiliations, co-dependency, and other connections that are poisoned or poisonous. As the author notes, toxic relationships "always have unbiblical, self-determined convictions and strategies, or unbelief, at their core. We think (believe) that we deserve to be loved the way we want and demand that people make us feel good about ourselves. We think (believe) that a deep connection with someone who becomes a god to us is actually a beautiful commitment" (41). And yet, the more "you let people rule your heart, the more insecure you will be" (88). These are constant themes in the booklet.

"Toxic Relationships" would make a useful family devotional, and it is ideal for adults and teens whether they are married or single. And if you're a counselor, it will be good homework material for  the people you're helping. I highly recommend the work.

My thanks to the editor and P&R Publishing for generously sending me a copy of the book as an unsolicited gift. They didn't ask for anything in return, but I thought I would do my part by freely and happily writing this small evaluation.

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